Showing posts with label narcissism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label narcissism. Show all posts

Sunday, April 19, 2009

football season is looming....



...and this "blog" needs a complete overhaul! Not just a shot of Botox and a new haircut, I'm talking a makeover of "The Swan" proportions. And by that I mean filled with cruelty and narcissism. Much like my soul.

I promise I will start using spellcheck. Ok, sometimes I will use spellcheck.

Some things to keep in mind:

1. Sun, Oct. 25 the Bucs will take on the Patriots in London. No, I will not be sporting my Joey Galloway jersey. I would also recommend avoiding whichever bar I am watching this game in. Trust me, you will not like the equation. Ashley + New England Fans + Bourbon + Sporting Event = Prison Time, I'm sure. Noticed I didn't say jail time.

2. Lately I have had a strong urge to photoshop pictures of Gruden and I so it looks like we are hanging out. And then I want to Blingee them.

3. Sabres are out, obv. Need I say more?

4. The Frozen Four was effin' epic this year.

5. I'm on the hunt for some Lawn Darts to add to my "Summer Shenanigans" kit. So far I have a slip-n-slide, a croquet set (for tackle croquet, of course), hot pink spray paint....


6. On a happy note, Pirates are in the race for the Calder Cup.

7. The other night some dude interrupted one of my tangents to ask if I was Jon Gruden's publicist.

8. Portland is getting a NBA D-League team. This pleases me greatly.

9. I'm getting kind of obsessed with Scott Ferrall. He calls everything! It gives me the vapors. But I can't find a Team Ferrall shirt small enough for me. Boo.

10. I hate the announcers on Versus.

11. Now that Madden has retired, the Crime Mob song "All Madden" has an entirely different meaning for me.

12. I don't know how to rotate photos.

13. I'm having a Derby Days party. You're all invited.

14. I had to remove some of the old content because I'm locked out of my Flickr Pro account. I forgot my password. Yeah, I'm that dumb. I will rework it and put it back up later.

15. The Dolphins have such a bullshit schedule this year....then again the Bucs don't really have it that great either.

16. I'm really excited to get out on the golf course. Hell, even mini-golf! I'm bout it bout it! If anyone needs a caddy, hit me up!


um, and speaking of caddies...

17. U 2008 Highlight Reel!



18. From the 7th Floor Blog, Clinton Portis was voted "Favorite Redskin" by Special Olympians

19. Also seen @ 7th Floor Blog (obviously a favorite) this amazing photo of Plaxico Burress at his court appearance. Maybe he's just stoked about the Spartan's making it to the final game?

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Gruden is my homeboy

Quick thought from the BBerry -

Jon Gruden on the NFL network = fucking hilarious. He reminds me so much of myself - the insane levels of enthusiasm, the excitement, the "I'm the only one in the room" people skills, the impracticality and lack of impulse control...

They should give him his own show.

Actually, eff that! They should give us an epic show together. That's right, the spastic twins will be taking over the NFL network!

You know you would TIVO that shit.....and buy the box set collectors edition with extra footage for a bargain at $49.99.....